“What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked in Mark 10:51.
“Rabbi, I want to see,” Bartimaeus responded.
This simple exchange teaches us so much about faith and healing!
After reading this story at our house church, we discussed these questions:
“How do you typically feel when you bring your questions to God—confident, hesitant, or fearful? What shapes your response?”
Take a minute to think about these and reflect.
Bartimaeus showed confidence and was bold in his approach to Jesus. This approach revealed his faith. He BELIEVED Jesus could and would give Him whatever he asked for.

Contents
Bringing Our Deepest Desires to God
How do you feel about asking God for what you want?
I tend to be hesitant and fearful about bringing my wants before God.
And Honestly – I believe God can do anything but I doubt that He will do it for me.
Dozens of struggles shape my answer but the one I’ll share is my relationship with headaches. I started getting migraines at the age of two. I’d get so sick that my mother was terrified I was dying and other people were sure I was faking it.
I have always believed God has the power to heal. I grew up in a religious environment of miracles. I saw them and heard about them all around me.
I prayed for decades for God to heal me. I went to prayer services, had “healers” pray for me, and lay hands on me. I recited James 5:14-15 and other scripture over and over.
Yet, I still got headaches.
And they got worse and worse.
It seemed to me that God didn’t listen or care.

I Stopped Asking God for Things
In addition to migraines, I started having cluster headaches. It affected my whole life.
It threatened my job.
My wife and children couldn’t trust me and they were afraid of me. I was angry.
I cursed God because of my doubt and self-focus. I couldn’t (or wouldn’t) see the blessings He was giving me because I didn’t get the blessing I wanted.
I became depressed and isolated. I stopped asking for even little things.
I didn’t believe God wanted anything good for me.
I stopped believing God was good.

Why Does God Refuse to Heal Me?
I believe it was because I didn’t trust God and I didn’t wait on God.
I wanted healing and I demanded it in my timing. My trust was in me: my righteousness; my will; my power to know right from wrong; my position in the story.
At the core, I believed God had to heal me just because I asked.
Then a few years ago I started putting my faith in the person of Jesus and in HIS will and HIS power.
I studied (and began to understand) God’s character. I fell in love with God. I decided to believe God is good and I decided to surrender to HIS will.
After a lot of wrestling with this (and many other struggles) I decided If Good heals me, GREAT! but if not, I’d be okay too.

God Does Answer
Over my whole life, God has granted me so much grace. I see now that He has been incredibly good to me.
He has answered those years of prayers for healing – just not in the way I wanted or expected.
I’m not completely headache-free but in comparison, they are virtually gone. The headaches I get now are few and to a MUCH lesser degree.
I do suffer from acute and chronic pain every day but my perspective has entirely changed.
I still often have doubts and I frequently edit my prayers. I still struggle to be confident before God and I struggle to believe I can ask Him for anything but I am learning to trust that God is good. It’s still a battle but God is changing me.
The Lord Has the Power to Give and Take Away
“The Lord gave and The Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised” Job 1:21
In God’s sovereignty, He has ultimate authority over every part of our lives. He may choose to give healing or withhold it. And yet, like Job, we are called to trust and praise Him.
The Bible tells us in Romans 8:28,
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
In our suffering, God is always working for our good.

Questions to Ask Yourself
- How do I approach God with my needs: boldly, hesitantly, or fearfully? Why?
- Do I trust that God is good? Even when He doesn’t answer my prayers exactly the way I want?
- What areas of my life do I need to surrender to God’s will? instead of relying on my wisdom and understanding
- How can I grow in my faith and be more like Bartimaeus… when it comes to confidence and faith in God’s power?
- Even in the waiting, am I grateful and recognizing God’s everyday blessings?